WW1 AS A PUB FIGHT

........nicked from Here

Germany, Austria and Italy are stood together in the middle of the pub, when Serbia bumps into Austria, and spills Austria's pint.


Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit, because there are splashes on its trouser leg.


Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view.


Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.


Serbia points out that it can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for cleaning Austria's trousers.


Russia and Serbia look at Austria.


Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at.


Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.


Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so.


Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene.


Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it?


Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action.


Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium.


Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone.


Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.


France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.


Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side, but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.


Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings, because Britain made Australia do it.


France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.


America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.


By now all the chairs are broken, and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

Morg
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GAZA HELL HOLE - AID SHIPS NEEDED

“The landscaped water park features three swimming pools, three water slides, ponds with pedal boats, a restaurant, a cafe, and a quiet area shaded by a tent where adults can sit on carpets and listen to music.”

Looks like a great place to take a holiday and now's the time to visit...Ramadan...no queues.. Except you'd be kept awake by the sounds of missiles being fired at Israel.

http://anallseeingeye.blogspot.com/

LEFTIST DOGOODER GETS HER COMEUPPANCE.

This is the sort of woman who New Labour would hold up and declare her role model for her "CHARITY" work helping Homeless Foreigners, so much so she helped a Foreigner A Ms Carmen Nobre to stay in this country, inviting her to live in her home.
but....

Suzy Butler and her son are camping in a friend’s garden after the 32-year-old’s former tenant allegedly refused to leave when they returned from Peru.

Ms Butler even required a police escort to get the tent from the home she has owned for five years – because of Carmen Nobre’s ‘squatter’s rights’.

‘I cannot believe my son and I are homeless while this woman is squatting in our house and there is nothing we can do about it,’ said Ms Butler.

‘She told me she had lost a lot of money on the stock exchange and she could not pay rent and would not be leaving.

‘I spend my life helping people who have been made homeless but never thought it would happen to me.’

Ms Butler let the home to Ms Nobre on a short-term agreement in February, before leaving for two months with four-year-old son Bruno.

She said the battle for the property in Hove, East Sussex, had cost her £1,000 in legal fees and the council and police had been unable to help.

Ms Nobre, who lives at the house with her daughter, has now been given two weeks to leave – but she could remain for months if the matter goes to court.

She declined to comment.

Maybe if she helped one of the many many homeless Indigenous Brits to stay this wouldn't have happened.
I have no-doubt this woman is a lefty and she deserves all she gets and I don't have agreat deal of sympathy for her.
She should actually have thought the safety of her sonr allowing a complete unkown foreigner (how do you know what her past was without having access to any records) to live with them.
Anyway, now she and her son can enjoy one of the benefits of letting the third world into their home.

HA.

A WOLF IN SHEEP'S CLOTHING

The hastily awarded recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize before he had done anything Barak Obama has shown his true colours (no pun intended) in his speech at a White House dinner celebrating Ramadan when he backed the building of a mosque near to "Ground Zero".
Do they usually have Ramadan dinners at the White House? I have not heard of this event before. He has shown by this speech what we already know, that he is not a real American. The son of a Kenyan muslim who soon abandoned him (what a surprise!) who spent time in Indonesia but became the president of the USA mainly on the back of the black voters who voted 95% for him.
Strictly speaking there are doubts whether he is a true American. You need more than a Yankee accent.
Now I can understand blacks voting for one of their own. That's natural but it is still a racist way of voting.
What many of these black Christians did not appreciate was that Obama is in reality a muslim but after this speech they must surely realise that fact.

I, in my tolerant way hoped he would bridge the gap between the muslim and Western worlds and hopefully end the conflict between the two systems. He had been friendly with black Christian pastors but the relatonship was obviously built on race but not creed.
Many here not least the BBC and Guardianistas were thrilled to have a black man as President of the USA and indeed I had no great problem with that.
However after his speech he has been exposed as a wolf in sheep's clothing. He has shown where his true loyalties lie.

To support a mosque being built by Ground Zero, a site with huge emotional significance for the American people shows his lack of empathy with them and contempt for their values.
It is a demonstration of the creeping influence of islam.
For this winner of the peace prize to back this project is an insult to the American people and those who died in that islam perpetrated atrocity.

Perhaps it is not all bad. At least it will wake up the American people to the danger facing us all. I doubt if they will fall for his oratory and give him a second term, and we may get an American president who not only realises the danger of islam but does something about it.

Buildings can be demolished if necessary so in spite of the insult every cloud has a silver lining.

LET'S HOPE SO and the Americans see the danger.

STAND TOGETHER

Now more than ever the BRITISH PATRIOTS should

STAND TOGETHER

GOODS IN TRANSIT

Here we go again. A picture taken from the WEP shows illegal immigrants in a load of motorbikes bound for Orrell caught by custom officers. I'm sure they would have added a much needed touch of "diversity" and "vibrancy" to our village life. How we have managed without them until now I don't know.
Five MEN from Afghanistan Iraq and Iran having travelled three thousand miles across muslim states, through Italy and France trying to smuggle themselves into Britain.
Are these the foreign experts we need to be able to compete internationally? They do not look as if they are.

Why have they crossed so many countries in an attempt to get here?
Why did they not stay in the first muslim country they came to, where they would have been in an environment where they would have felt more at home?
We of course get the usual sob stories they were being persecuted, their lives were in danger etc, etc.

Well what about the women and children they left behind? will they have been persecuted? If so it is a bit callous to leave these relatives behind.
Or were they trouble makers in their own countries? In which case we don't want them here.
Why did they not want to remain in France or Italy? It is simple. They are ATTRACTED here.
It's no good the government saying putting extra controls on the borders alone is enough. Yes that is vital but we must stop the attraction which in this case, money taken from the british people in taxes.

If you leave scraps of food around your house, inside or outside you will be troubled by rats and mice. They are ATTRACTED. Remove the attraction and you will not be bothered.
We should remove the attractions of our country which are obviously considerable or so many would not try to get here.
Yes I know we will have sob stories from immigrant supporting Lefties who say life in this country is hard for "refugees". It's obviously not hard enough to act as a deterrant not even with the Channel to hinder them. They don't try to go to Russia which is closer to their home countries and accesible by land, in fact as far as easy access is considered we are the most difficult country to get to.

Yes these people have been caught, but how many get through? How many are Wigan Metro housing under a different label? How many house must be built over our countryside to accomodate them?.How many of our jobs will they take?

So the answer, make this country as unattractive as say Syria or Italy or France and, PROBLEM SOLVED.
But will this spineless muslim appeasing Government ever do it?

YOU BET THEY WONT! because they are bent on destroying us and this is just one of their ways.

GET READY TO TIGHTEN YOUR BELTS.

Taken from todays Telegraph -

Savings accounts will become 'obsolete'

Savings accounts will become “totally obsolete” if inflation rises next week, experts have warned.

Latest figures suggested that not a single saver in Briton would make a real return on their cash if the cost of living continues to rise.

Historically low interest rates and the government’s preferred measure of inflation, the Consumer Prices Index, at 3.2 per cent means savers are already struggling to get an income.

There are currently no accounts available to higher rate taxpayers that provide a real rate of return after tax and inflation, and just a handful available to basic rate taxpayers. But even these could be nudged off the savings landscape, financial experts warned.

They suggested that if CPI rises to above 3.8 per cent, there will be no
point any taxpayer using a savings account to produce an income.



In this situation, savers would actually end up losing money and could end up being more than £300 out of pocket in a year on a £10,000 investment.

Darren Cook, of personal finance website Moneyfacts, said: “If inflation rises to 3.8 per cent, all savings accounts will effectively be totally obsolete.

“Savers have to fight hard to get within an arms length just to break even and avoid losing money.”

And Andrew Hagger, of personal finance website Moneynet, said: "Savers are nearing their wits end, and more and more people are going to be giving up the savings habit."

There are currently no accounts for higher rate taxpayers and there are just 34 accounts – nearly all are fixed rate bonds which require savers to lock in their money for three years or more – for basic rate taxpayers. It equates to just 0.2 per cent of the savings market.

At 3.8 per cent, higher rate tax payers would need to find an account paying 6.33 per cent to avoid losing money once inflation is taken into account and basic rate taxpayers would need to achieve 4.75 per cent.

The real return for a basic rate taxpayer once inflation is taken into account on an average no notice account is currently minus 3.21 per cent, meaning they would actually lose the equivalent of £321 if they invested £10,000 over a year if CPI reached 3.8 per cent.

Economists expect inflation to climb higher in the coming months.

Petrol prices could pass £1.20 a litre by the August bank holiday weekend, close to an all-time high.

And the price of a loaf of bread is expected to rise by 10p to 129p, which would be a record. Russia suffered from its hottest summer in a century, wiping out much of the world’s wheat harvest.

Motorists and retailers will also be hit when Value Added Tax rises by 2.5 per cent to 20 per cent in January.

Things are going to get difficult for EVERYONE to say the least.